4 Skills You Can Learn in Premarital Counseling to Help You Have a Strong Marriage


Marriage is a wonderful part of life, but it can also be one of the hardest things you will do. This is why many couples decide to go through premarital counseling before they say their vows. Premarital counseling is designed to help couples understand what marriage is and how to build a successful, fulfilling marriage. Through this, you can learn more about yourself and your spouse, but you will also learn skills that will help both of you create a marriage that is lifelong. Here are four skills you can learn by attending premarital counseling.

Learn to Listen

Listening may seem like something that is easy to do, and it might be when you first enter a relationship. Over time, though, this can become a problem with couples. In premarital counseling, you can learn about the importance of having good listening skills, and this may help you put this into practice during your entire marriage.

When you learn to attentively listen to your spouse, you will show him or her respect. Attentively listening also shows your spouse that you value what he or she is saying. One of the best ways to truly listen is to develop a habit of putting yourself in your spouse's shoes while he or she speaks. By practicing this, you can really begin to understand what he or she is saying to you. This is also a good way to avoid becoming defensive, which is a natural response when you hear something you do not like or agree with.

Develop Hobbies Together

Another thing you will learn during premarital counseling is the importance of developing hobbies together as a couple. Having hobbies on your own is also fine, but when you find things you enjoy doing together, it can help your marriage stay successful.

Spending time together as a couple is vital for your relationship, but this can be hard to do if you do not have things you both enjoy doing. If you can find a mutual hobby, it can help you stay connected. It can also help you grow together and enjoy life as a couple.

Create Constructive Ways to Resolve Conflict

Learning how to deal with conflict constructively is another important skill to develop before you wed. While new couples may not fight a lot at first, conflict will occur. Conflict generally occurs from differences in opinions, expectations, and philosophies of life. This is completely normal with all couples, but you can have a happier marriage if you can develop constructive ways to deal with these differences. Some tips you may learn during counseling can include:

  • Have the right attitude—Developing an attitude that you win when both of you are satisfied with the result of a conflict is a good attitude to have.
  • Avoid harm during arguments—Saying things you do not mean during an argument causes harm to your spouse and to your marriage. Learning to control what you say is vital.
  • Find the right time to talk—It may also be important to develop a strategy for discussing conflicts. For example, you might want to agree to discuss them during the evening, instead of throwing issues at the other person in the morning right before work.

There are many ways to handle conflict, and learning the best methods will help you in your marriage.

Build Trust in Your Relationship

The fourth skill is one of the most important to learn and understand for your marriage. This skill involves building trust. Trust makes spouses feel safe and secure, yet it is not always something that naturally happens.

When you find ways to build trust, you will be building your relationship, but this might involve setting up rules or boundaries in your marriage. For example, you could agree to have access to each other's phones, passwords, and electronics. This is a great way to build trust. You could also agree never to be alone with someone of the opposite sex.

Developing strategies for your upcoming marriage is a great way to start the marriage off right. If you are interested in learning more about this, contact a counseling center like Associates For Counseling & Psychotherapy today.


3 November 2015

Counseling is Important Even if You Are Taking Depression Medication

I suffered depression for much of my life, and I lived with it for years before seeking help. I visited a psychiatrist and received an antidepressant prescription along with a referral to a counselor. I filled my prescription, but I put off making an appointment with the counselor. The medication began to help, so I decided that I didn't need to see a counselor after all -- or so I thought at the time. After a couple of months of medication, a close friend of mine died of an illness. I then learned that even though the medication helped my depression, I still had not learned the coping skills I needed to deal with traumatic life experiences. That even motivated me to seek counseling, and it helped me immensely. I created this blog to remind others that medication can help when suffering with depression, but counseling is also extremely important.